Holidays After Losing Loved Ones

Handsome husband comforting his crying wife during session

Holidays could be exhausting and stressful, even during the friendliest times. There are several expectations placed on you to be excited and joyful upon seeing friends and family during the holidays. Not many know that a lot of people usually feel disappointed, or even let down, post family gatherings. And if a loved one has recently died, holidays could usher in more sadness and stress, eventually leading to unprecedented loneliness.

Spending a holiday season that falls after the demise of a loved one could be quite messy and complicated, but you can still enjoy the season in parts. The following are some tips to get through the holidays while grieving.

Discuss the Deceased

The absence of a loved one becomes a lot more glaring when none speaks about them. Most people do the mistake of not talking about a deceased friend or family member when they meet. Instead, you can share stories and memories about them in gatherings of family and friends. Focus more on the funny stories. If smiles and laughter erupt during the discussions, then that’s perfectly acceptable. Those chuckles, in fact, are a completely healthy and normal way to ease your grief and sadness.

Blend Traditions

Honouring the deceased loved one’s life could mean feeling the obligation to maintain the traditions that were passed down by them to you – for instance, making a specific Christmas meal or New Years cake. But don’t think you are honoring the deceased by performing traditions that you were never interested in. Instead, pick a tradition or two that you fancied and merge them with newer traditions so that you could move on. The newer traditions would, in fact, foster healing and give you the ability to move forward.

Cut Down Seasonal Stressors

The holidays are replete with stressful obligations, such as gift-giving, social gatherings, volunteering and cooking. Cut back on these commitments so that you have some healing space. While completely withdrawing and sitting the holiday season out won’t be a healthy route to take, you may certainly take breaks from obligations or events that cause undue stress. If your office colleagues are looking forward to that special dish you make every year for the holidays and you don’t show up this season, they would understand that you pulled back due to your personal loss.

Keep an Eye Out for Unhealthy Coping Resorts

The holidays could intensify feelings of loss and grief. Therefore, it’s important to know your emotions and how you are reacting to them. Loss of appetite, exhaustion, and feelings of hopelessness and apathy could be signs your grief may be making you vulnerable to depression. This may result in unhealthy behaviors, such as self-harm and excess alcohol consumption.
Your first holiday after losing loved ones can be difficult. But it’s important to not completely give in to the feeling. Take care of yourself. Remembering loved ones and enjoying the holiday seasons tradition can lessen some pain while helping your progress during the grieving. Unhealthy coping techniques, on the other hand, may help you escape the grief and stress temporarily, but once the unhealthy measures’ effects subside, the grief you were running away from would come back to hit you harder.

Try Mental Health Support

If the grief is unbearable, seeking support or treatment is recommended. Be part of support groups, attend faith-community events or lectures and seek professional therapy (if that would help). Contact Kevon Owen at 405-740-1249 or visit https://www.kevonowen.com for a healthy dose of Christian counseling and clinical psychotherapy. Connecting with people who share common experiences would help you chuck isolation, thereby decreasing your chances of falling into depression. Your emotional and mental well-being are too crucial to overlook, particularly when you’re completely down and out and it’s the holidays.



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Anxiety During The Holidays

Young beautiful woman wearing Christmas Santa hat depressed and worry for distress, crying
angry and afraid. Sad expression.

Anxiety and depression during the holidays are more common than most people think. At Kevon Owen Christian Counseling, Clinical Psychotherapy the team of mental health professionals can help you manage your problems with understanding and empathy. The staff knows that the holidays can cause stress and anxiety, but for many people, the level of anxiety can become intolerable. Anxiety and depression also foster feelings of guilt because of the religious nature of the holidays, and that can aggravate the mental turmoil.

Learn to Relieve the Holiday Pressure

Kevon Owen operates from two offices: Clinical Psychotherapy Edmond Oklahoma and Clinical Psychotherapy Jones Oklahoma. The staff and doctors understand the feeling of anxiety and guilt, and they can help you with various psychotherapy techniques and medications to relieve extreme stress. There are also techniques that you can use to relieve stress and get through the holiday season.
Some of the techniques you can do for self-help include taking off some of the pressure. Holiday parties, traveling and attending family gatherings are common stressors that can have unintended effects that produce anxiety, depression or both. The following tips can help you avoid some of the root causes of holiday stress:

• Avoid setting high expectations, and try to roll with the flow of good and bad moments.
• Understand that no plans are perfect, and you are only human.
• Try to avoid friends and family members who have social anxieties that could ignite your own.
• Work to make others feel good to relieve the stress on you to do the same.
• Avoid drugs and alcohol because they exacerbate both anxiety and depression.
• Know when to say no – ir is not necessary to do anything that makes you sad, stressed out or uncomfortable.
• Don’t over schedule yourself; most families typically try to do more than they should and treat the holidays like a marathon..
• Don’t feel obligated to buy gifts for everyone if you can’t afford them or simply don’t wish to buy gifts for casual acquaintances.

Getting Professional Therapy and Treatment

When you find the holidays overwhelming, it can be very helpful to talk out your problems with a sympathetic listener – especially one who understands that religious feelings can complicate holiday depression. At Kevon Owen Christian Counseling the staff can provide active, trained listeners who give you the social support that you desperately need during the critical holiday season. The causes and symptoms of holiday anxiety and depression include:
• Unrealistic expectations
• Excessive commitments
• Financial pressure
• Seasonal affective disorder, or SAD
• Excessive drinking
• Insomnia
• Headaches
• Overeating

Clinical Psychotherapy Oklahoma City Oklahoma

The team at Kevon Owen offers counseling, support services, psychotherapy and medication as needed to help you overcome your holiday issues. Mild cases of anxiety can often be resolved with simple steps to relieve the pressure of holiday excesses. If your case is serious, the physicians assistant and staff have the tools to manage even the most extreme cases of holiday depression.
Call or contact Kevonowen.com at 405-740-1249 or https://www.kevonowen.com to schedule a confidential consultation. The practice serves the Oklahoma City, Jones and Edmond Oklahoma areas. You don’t have to suffer from anxiety and depression just because the holidays have rolled around once again.



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15 Mantras To Recite When You’re Getting Over Someone Who Cheated

young woman deep in thought

There are few things more devastating than a bad breakup, especially when it happens because one partner broke the other’s trust. As you’re getting over someone who cheated, you might struggle with feelings of anger, betrayal, heartache, confusion, and sadness, just to name a few — and that’s completely normal. You are absolutely not alone. Lean on friends and family for support, seek professional help if you’re able to, and trust that you will ultimately heal.
While you recalibrate your routine and begin to move on, it can be useful to have a few mantras on hand. Write them on your bathroom mirror, recite them as you’re heading to work or class, or set reminders on your phone to stop and breathe. While this may feel silly at first, there’s evidence that mantras really do help shift your mindset. According to a 2015 study in the Brain and Behavior journal, silent, positive repetitive speech can actually produce a calming effect on the brain. By reminding yourself over and over that you’re loved and worthy, you can train your mind to fully believe it.
If you have experienced cheating or affairs or know someone who needs help with this this article might be helpful for you if you have experienced infidelity. Kevon Owen is a featured contributing author in this article which can be found at this link. If you would like to discuss this with Kevon he can be reached by phone at 405-740-1249 or you can visit his website at https://www.kevonowen.com.


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6 Reasons Toddlers Are Obsessed With Doors (Because They *All* Are)

In my house, there are 30 doors (including closets). I only know this random number because at almost any given point during the day, I’m warning my two little ones to stop swinging/slamming/shutting/opening/closing them. My toddlers’ obsession with doors only rivals their obsession with dinosaur chicken nuggets and chocolate.

I’ll be in the middle of telling the 4-year-old something, and I’ll find her dangling off of a doorknob by, like, her leg. Then, the 2-year-old, in a total monkey-see-monkey-do move, will push the door with all his might to swing it — and her — on it. And while I’m shrieking because, hello, I don’t want someone to fall and crack their head open, they’re hysterically laughing. Gotta love parenting.
In a way, I totally get it. Doors are fun. They do a whole lot more than just let people pass through them. “Toddlers find new spaces and tasks exciting, and doors are one of them,” Anastasia Gavalas, MS, SDA, a parenting expert and author of Leadership Through the Eyes of Children, tells Romper. Still, I’ve seriously considered stripping my house of all the unimportant doors (as parents, do we even really need a bathroom door, anyway?) as a way to keep my littles safe.

But as it turns out, toddlers can learn a lot from doors. Here are some reasons why you might want to keep them on their hinges — without you becoming unhinged yourself.

This article in it’s entirety is available at this link. Kevon Owen is a featured contributing author in this article and if you are seeking help with a toddler or need child and adolescent therapy in Edmond Oklahoma you can contact Kevon Owen at 405-740-1249 or you can visit his website at https://www.kevonowen.com.



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11 Relationship Red Flags/ Warning Signs of Trouble Ahead

young couple having relationship troubles

Hold on a second, you think. I feel like this guy is acting inappropriately. But is it all in my head? I’m sure it is. He’s so wonderful and charming, this must just be me overthinking things!
If you’re worried that your new partner is acting strangely, improperly or aggressively, it’s important to not ignore these feelings. Our intuition for toxic partners tends to be spot on, and it’s critical to get out of an unhealthy relationship early.
People are often in denial when they think they’re seeing red flags in a relationship. “Many of my clients and people that I come in contact with actually see the early warning signs but tend to ignore them because of the narrative in their own head,” said Joe Martino, LPC, a relationship therapist based in Grand Rapids, Mich., and author of The Emotionally Secure Couple.
Make sure you’re aware of the early warning signs of a toxic partner by being on the lookout for these 11 red flags in a relationship.
If you are in a relationship and have reason to believe you may need to speak with someone about your situation please read the linked article. Kevon Owen Christian Counseling Clinical Psychotherapist is a featured contributing author in this article. To speak with Kevon about your individual therapy needs you can call him at 405-740-1249 or you can visit his website at https://www.kevonowen.com.



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8 tips for getting good at small talk/ Ask questions, avoid sensitive topics, and more

• Small talk can exacerbate social anxiety or simply make us feel uncomfortable; however, doing it well can aid success in our personal and professional lives.

• Get good at small talk by first asking questions; have a few generic questions handy to ask new friends or colleagues and tune in to their responses.

• Also consider joining a group that you’re interested in, like a fitness group, sports club, or something else that brings like-minded people together; this will make conversation easy and enjoyable.

• Avoiding sensitive topics can also help you get good at small talk; additionally, picking the right person to chat with can make all the difference.

• Additionally, remember that practice makes perfect and come prepared by staying up to date on recent events or popular topics of conversation.

• Finally, stop making it about you; a key to small talk success is focusing on the individual you’re engaging with, as everyone’s favorite subject to talk about is themselves!

Small talk is informal conversation about unimportant or easygoing topics. So, why is it so hard? Well, many of us suffer from social anxiety, which stems from the fear of being negatively judged by others. And even more of us simply feel uncomfortable when forced to converse with strangers or people we just don’t feel like talking to! That being said, small talk is sometimes necessary and getting good at it can prove valuable to our personal and professional lives. If you struggle with small talk, here are 8 professional tips that will help you to improve:

1. Ask questions.

First, ask questions about the individual you’re engaging with. It’s a good idea to always have a few questions handy. “The very best way to make fast friends out of new colleagues, acquaintances, or guests at a party is to ask questions and listen and share your own response to the same question,” explains Dana Kaland, Executive Coach and Consultant. “Have a few open-ended questions in the tool kit at all times so when you feel some social anxiety coming on you can draw from them. Surprisingly, some of the most basic questions are the best: Where do you live? What do you do? How long have you worked here? What are your weekend plans? How do you know the bride or the groom?”

Kevon Owen is a featured contributing author in this article. To read the entire article please click this link. If you would like to speak with Kevon about any relationship or individual counseling or if you need psychology or psychiatric services please call Kevon at 405-740-1249 or you can contact him online at https://www.kevonowen.com.

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The Best Low-Investment Date Ideas, Recommended by Dating Experts | Cheap and Fun Dates for Non-Committal Singles

Handsome young man and pretty blonde woman couple in park

Low investment dates have become the new norm. Meaning,  any serious investment in another person – be it money or effort – is minimal. This is most likely a circumstance of dating app culture, along with the collective need for instant gratification (think Veruca Salt-like behavior from “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory”).

It’s unfortunate, but a first date is no longer a first date. It’s become an effort to earn the first date. If someone cannot handle a low investment commitment of something like a cup of coffee, they’re not ready – or, in the minds of singles, deserving – of a higher investment date like dinner and drinks.

RELATED: An Idiot-Proof Guide to Pulling Off an Epic First Date

This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. In fact, this newer method is proving relatively successful. For instance, Bloomberg recently credited millennials for plummeting divorce rates. And for what it’s worth, 29 percent of heterosexual and 65 percent of gay couples have met online. Even crazier? Tinder matches have officially outnumbered people on the planet. It’s truly mind-boggling, but that’s just the world we live in now.

But this is not the only reason we’ve decided to elect a more casual approach. In addition to the culture created by dating apps, millennials have graduated with more debt into the worst recession in 80 years. Simply put, they cannot afford to whip out their wallets on dates like previous generations have.

To help navigate this new (and cheaper) standard of digital dating, we reached out to several dating professionals — matchmakers, psychotherapists, dating coaches and sex-positive podcast hosts — to recommend some fun, low investment date ideas to make future planning a cinch.

Kevon Owen is a featured contributing author in this article. To read the entire article please click this link. If you would like to consult with Kevon Owen about your situation please call him at 405-740-1249 or you can visit his website at this address, https://www.kevonowen.com.

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